One Tuesday morning I was in the thick of it. I don’t think there is any mother who would tell you caring for two babies under three, the youngest with colic, is for the faint of heart. I recall this specific morning a hot pink nail polish explosion in the living room. And while tending to our two barking dogs, cleaning up breakfast, toddler boy went tumbling down the stairs. My heart just about stopped when I saw that scene. He was OK and of course, I wasn’t. So what do you do? I loaded the two kids in the car and drove to McDonalds. This location had a play area, and it was enclosed. Nobody can escape. I can feed the kids and maybe sit alone in peace for 30 minutes. I prayed that I saw no one I knew. My hair had not been washed in days and I was covered in spit-up.
Not moments later a tall blonde beautiful mom from the neighborhood walked in, damn it! She also had two little ones and was likely seeking the same refuge. Little did I know what a blessing the connection I made with her that day would be over the next 10 years as friends and moms. We are raising our kids alongside a solid group of moms in our neighborhood. A community for stay-at-home moms is necessary. There is a reason someone said “It takes a village.” It’s required to survive. I can be the type to pray that I don’t see someone I know when I leave the how. I don’t want to look disheveled or have to be vulnerable when I don’t have it all together. Which is most of the time. Online communities were a source of comfort to me as well. I remember discovering momastary, a blog that Glennon Melton was writing so truthfully and beautifully about motherhood and marriage. I would read her words when I was awake in the middle of the night, breastfeeding. It helped me feel less alone. That community felt like my people.
After baby number three, I felt an itch. Actually I was really itchy. I had been working in the home, caring for my babies and I loved being there for every moment. I was so grateful. But there was a part of that life I started to resent. A bunch of moms I knew had a playgroup that got together regularly, rotating at each other’s houses. As people came and went from that group, the typical conversations went from something deep and meaningful and relatable to very surface level. Some of these families were very well off with one income, and facial treatments, home remodels and overseas vacations became the main topics. I will admit that my visceral reaction to this and resentment over time came from a place of jealousy. But I’m also a deep thinker, and I love connecting with people in small group settings. These gatherings that used to recharge me were now draining me, and making me doubt the blessed life I had because it wasn’t quite at the level of the Jones’s.
I mentioned I’m a deep thinker and I am also an idea generator. I am constantly thinking about how to improve and grow. This is true for parenting. I would read blogs, listen to podcasts and read books about child development and nutrition. I also kept generating business ideas. I have always loved real estate and back in the 2000’s when flipping houses was all the rage, I would watch all of those shows and read books on it. I love looking at Zillow and imagining moving somewhere new, but also owning rental property. I have thought of countless technology or product ideas that I get really excited about but never move forward with because I don’t know how. I don’t have that executor partner to help me move my dreams forward. I realized that with any purchase of Real Estate or investment in a business, you need cash. I started thinking about what it could look like for me to earn an income again to put toward some of these more lofty goals, without impacting the family budget.
My first job after years of being at home was with a company called Stitch Fix. You have likely heard of this woman-owned business and you might be a customer. They had a great model for a mom who wanted to get paid to use their brain in a creative and fun way. The hours were great too, because they didn’t require full time. Why did I think Stitch Fix would want to hire me? Not sure, but I found the confidence somewhere inside to apply and show up for an in-person interview session they were holding locally in Minneapolis. I started working for them a minimum of 15 hours per week. I would mainly get my work done when my kids were napping or late at night when they were sleeping.
This job wasn’t the permanent answer, but it catapulted me into the working world again. It got me thinking about possibilities and I gained confidence in my ability to forge a new path. After about a year at Stitch Fix I started looking at LinkedIn jobs, Indeed and and was casually reaching out to friends who maintained and grew their careers while I put mine on pause. I This was how I started my journey back into marketing & advertising as a stay at home mom of 7 years.
Building It diary 